KOCC

first a few notes:
~I have the Ruebot megaphone. I walked away with it last week to yell at The Furies and never brought it back to the other side of the field and the 'bots never came and got it from me. So I'll bring that on Sunday.

~Land-O-Pines rules the cool school.

~DragonForce.

~If you think about it, our league is exactly like the 18 best selling albums of all time (worldwide, according to Wikipedia):

1. Cobra Kai.
Just like Thriller, the number one selling album of all time, this group knows how to keep their games exciting. You're listening and you're like, "this song is with Paul McCartney, but its not THAT good...in fact its kinda boring. Then BAM! Thriller! BAM! Beat It! and BAM!BAM! Billie Jean. Take that, mother fuckers! 13-4 Win!

2. Bushwhackers.
So you're a kid in 1980 and your favorite band's singer just died (on the day Coach was born!?!) and you go and pick up Back In Black because even though the band lost the singer, you also dig ACDC because of the guitar...so you check it out...and its Back In Black and you're like, "He's no Bon Scott, but he'll do"...he'll do, indeed...49,000,000 copies worth.

Back in Black {Jesus}

3. Fuzz.
Unlike Dark Side Of The Moon, if you play Dangle from the start of The Wizard of Oz he melts at the end.

4. Pieholes.
Shane, Peacetrain, Sean Cherry, Quinn, Cougar...I think the ladies on this team don't have to worry about a Body Guard...but I bet Drew and Fancy Shoes can rock the the shit out of a duet version of, "don't make me close one more dooorrr....i don't wanna hurt anymore....stay in my arms if you dare...must i imagine you there...don't walk away from me...i have nothing, nothing, NOTHING if I don't have you-uuu-uuu."

5. The Wariors.
The Warriors are a good team.
The Warriors are a competative team.
The Warriors are no where near as cool as Meat Loaf.
Two Outta Three Ain't Bad.

6(9ers).
Just like The Eagles The 69ers just have to Take It Easy. They can't press the issue; lineup, kick the ball, and score. Luckily after the tie on Sunday their playoff chances aren't Already Gone.

7. The Maulers are pretty much exactly like The Dirty Dancing Soundtrack.
They HAD the time of their life (in 2007), they want to Stay (in the playoff picture) and they've got Hungry Eyes now that the 69ers have shown signs of weakness.

8. The Furies.
The Furies are so much like the Backstreet Boys, its not even enough of a joke to put here.
Beast is Kevin.
Correct is Brian.
Eddie is Nick Carter
Styles is AJ.
B-Pop is Howie.


9. Dread Pirate Roberts Bar.
Saturday Night Fever, Sunday Afternoon Boogie.

More than A Woman to Me.

10. The Juice Factory.
Just when you thought Stevie Nicks and the rest of Juice Factory were going to be coming out in droves every week, they missed their chance to turn Saturn Bar into the dancehall classic venue it's been for seasons...We lost you guys just when we needed you most...Don't Stop comin' to the bars, guys, You Make Lovin' Fun.


11. The Master Racers.
Big Dick is making sure the ladies of KOCC can say, "MAN! I feel like a Woman!" While Trent and Booger are making sure the Master Racers put a crooked number in the wins column.


12. Sexy Back.
Led Zeppelin IV.


13. The Tonics.
I've got one hand in my pocket, the others giving megaphone guy a peace sign.


14. The BeatAlls.

Sgt. Peppers' Lonely Hearts Club Band.


15. Scallywags.
Celine Dion is a bitch from Canada who married an old man. The Scallywags play out of MCYC...um...i'm desperate for some sort of coloration...


16. The Hangovers.
Mariah Carey used to have a voice that could hit all kinds of octives. The Hangovers have a team that can hit all kinds of bars in a night.


17. Defenders.
The Most Dangerous thing about The Ruebots is when they forget to put the top of your coffee on all the way and you spill it on your pressed suit.


18. The Shockers.
The Pizza and Abita special at NY Pizza is #1.

I LOVE that I'm the creepy BSB.


I really liked this one Coach. Especially the Pieholes part.

Dear Coach,
You see through, right to the heart of me.
You break down my walls
with the strength of your love
I never knew, love like I've known it with you.

Stiles is spelled wrong and it took me a minute to figure it out. And, just cuz I don't remember, what was their hits and is there a gay one?

The gay one was Aaron Carter, Nick's little shitbrother.

My fave of theirs was always "I Want It That Way." Other chart toppers include: "Everybody (aka 'Backstreet's Back,' which you might remember had the creepy music video in a mansion where it seemed BSB tried to update Thriller or something)," "As Long As You Love Me ('I don't care who you are/where you been/what you did...')," "Quit Playing Games With My Heart" and the very underrated "Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonelyyyyyy"...'Is this the feeling I need to want, babe...tell me why...' (I always belt this out everytime I go to an airport).

MY SISTER WOULD BE SO PROUD OF ME RIGHT NOW!!! OMG!!!